01 February, 2006


From the BBC Sport live Premier League update:

Reports claim that Arsenal's Sol Campbell, who was substituted at half-time against West Ham, got changed and left Highbury without watching the second half.

I think it's called Schadenfreude. Well, I happen to know that's exactly what it's called.

Campbell is, of course, a former favourite. In 2001, his Spurs contract ran out. As a free agent, he had his pick of clubs. He'd already made it clear that he believed his future lay in Europe.

Lo and behold, rather than Real or Inter, Sol turns up in N.5 just down the road from N.17. Those that inhabit N.5 are interlopers, moving from their natural home south of the river. Not only did that club bribe the league to allow invading another club's territory, but after the First World War another brown envelope ensured their first division status.

Sol. You were mistaken. The cries of "Judas" were because you lied to the faithful. Your excuse that you didn't realise the hurt a move down the Seven Sisters Road would cause is still hollow.

But. You can redeem yourself. Ditch the blood red shirt. Phone up Martin Jol. Tell him you'll play for free. The "Yid Army" will come out and throw coins to you to pay your electricity bill. Heck, we might hand over some notes to help out with some bling or pay for your helicopter.


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